After a few weeks of really, REALLY cold temperatures it got into the 50's today! Wow...it felt sooooo good to get out of the car and not have every muscle in my body to tense up from the cold air. It was nice! I got off work at 2:30 and right before I got into the car to come home Mary sent me a text saying that I should go for a walk and enjoy God's creation. You know what?....I thought that sounded like a GREAT idea! I have not taken any time for myself in a while and I needed some alone time and she knows how much I love the outdoors. I had 2 1/2 hours before I had to pick up Travis form wrestling practice so I ran home changed clothes and headed to Chinqua Penn trail.
I pulled up in the familiar gravel lot and got out of the truck with nothing in hand. No cell phone, pocketbook, school books, or anything else that would weigh me down and even though I haven't ran in a couple of months I decided I would just see how far I could jog without falling over..lol. As I began to run the trail...I began to run my mouth to the Lord as well. You've heard the term "spilled your guts"...well, I did just that. I told the Lord how I felt, how disappointed I was in the way some things were going, how hurt I was about other situations and how angry I was concerning others, how "I" wanted things to work out. And when I got it all out...I realized I had almost ran the whole trail and was still jogging. I began to look around at the scenery and it was beautiful. As the sound of my feet were pounding across the wooden brige I noticed that the water was still frozen. I noticed snow on the side of the bank that has now been there for a month! It is still white and clean...no footprints or tracks in it, still in tact. I got to thinking about how warm it had gotten today and yet it surprised me that this ice and snow were still present. Then the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said .."How warm does it have to get to melt your heart?" At times we have places in our hearts...the "banks in the shade" if you will, that get cold with bitterness, jealousy, disappointment, broken promises, etc. and the ice and snow...just don't melt that easily. We may have warmth from a message or devotion or song that begins to warm and melt away the snow...but because we have it tucked so deep into the recesses of our heart...it remains cold and frozen. You see after I voiced all my complaints to the Lord...it was then I noticed his creation. It was when I got "quiet" that he used this illustration of nature to warm my heart...to remind me of How GREAT He is ...and how small I am. To remind me that he has given me blessing after blessing, handfuls of puropse many, many days of my life.
As the coldness of my heart began to soften from the warmth of his love and conviction the Holy Spirit also showed me this. As I jogged around I noticed how barren the trees were and how you could see through them and far beyond what you'd be able to see come spring when the leaves filled all the open spaces. The Holy Spirit showed me that is exactly the way the Lord is with us. It is during our barren times...the coldness of life..the "winter" of life that even though circumstances may be confusing and we see no clarity whatsoever...there is one who becomes very clear...the Lord Jesus himself. When we are forced to our knees, when we cry out to our Father for help...it is then that we see farther spiritually than we ever had. When the trees are green and lush and thick with leaves and life is good...we sometimes forget who those blessings come from. God help me to allow your Word to melt the coldness of the deep places of my heart...illuminate every part of me with your light and help me to recognize the times of difficulty as a time to know you better than I ever have. Thank you for a friend who obeyed a prompting by you to tell me to go for a walk/run. Thank you for speaking to me through creation and most of all thank you for listening and loving me.
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